Wednesday, March 03, 2010

And to think Fiji Water was enough


No, apparently we have to make water even more expensive.

Thank you Bling H20 of making me realize that you can market just about anything- including a $40 bottle of water.

What's their story? Apparently Mr. Kevin G. Boyd, a writer-producer, saw that in Hollywood, where image is of utmost importance, you could tell a lot about a person by the bottle of water they carried.

Long story short, their mission is to offer "an exquiste face to match our exquiste taste". The brand features frosted bottles decorated with Swarovski crystals.The water contained in the bottle comes from a Tennessee spring and is purified in a nine-step process that includes ozone, ultraviolet treatment and micro-filtration.

Bling H2O was initially introduced to hand-selected athletes and actors. The bottled water is now available to the public. Bling H2O has been featured at the MTV Video Music Awards and The Emmys.

*gently place palm into face"

Some quick observations:
1. Why would I be carrying a glass bottle around with me? I know that celebrities have hectic lives as well, and there will be dropping- and you cannot just carry it around on set or something.
2. It's made in Tennessee. You pay for Fiji water because it was bottled in Fiji and it's awesome. Even (don't quote me) some of the $5 hotel water is from exotic locations. I admire Tennessee and its beauty- but why can I not pay for paradise water?
3. It's a nine step purification. I did my research and found that Aquafina is a seven step procress- and included processes like ultraviolet, reverse osmosis, and is constantly purified and filtered until there is nothing but good h20. So what's the difference? 2 extra steps.
4. I have to give a tip of the hat to the fact that it's glass which is more recyclable than plastic.
5. They have a "breast cancer" themed bottle. There is nothing interesting about it except that it has a pink ribbon necklace. At least tell me it's going to a good cause. Of course not.
6. They however have plastic bottles for Haiti, that if you buy they would send your case with two other cases to give to the relief efforts. Bravo, but no one can really tell the difference. Plus, how much of the profits are you keeping?

This product is the devil to me right now. I have a bare minimum amount of savings right now- and to know that people are wasting money on fancy water makes me a very sad panda.

The worst part- the main page has a celulitte-free model with a crystal thong. Oh lawd.

It is at this time that we commerate this moment by thinking of the song "Rich and Famous" by Good Charlotte. I think we should save them.

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